You seem to be losing sight of something here, STO: monogamy is only a moral dilemma from a viewpoint of one particular set of morals.

That being said, it seems to me that you have adopted that particular set of morals as your own: I respect that, and will not in any way, criticize you for doing so.

However, I will point out that the answer may lie in re-examining this ethical system, and making a desicion (and this decision *must* include the input of your s/o) about whether or not you feel you need to continue along this path.

Then, whtever path you do choose to follow, stick to it.

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On the kinkometer, my kink measures as a sine wave.